Telling your kids that you are getting a divorce is possibly one of the most challenging things you will ever do. Watching them go through different emotions, asking questions and partly feeling responsible for the divorce can be difficult. Nonetheless, approaching the discussion with the right tips can make your work more manageable.
Here are two things to remember when discussing divorce with your kids:
1. Criticizing the other parent is never okay
Undoubtedly, you may be angry with your soon-to-be ex-spouse. However, you should not let your kids notice this, especially if they are younger. If they ask why you are going through a divorce, you can give them a few details or use statements like “We have decided it’s best to go our separate ways,” and so on.
If they are old enough, you can provide more details but don’t overwhelm them with information only adults should know.
It’s crucial for your kids to still respect both parents during and after the divorce. In fact, it will help if both of you can be present during the conversation and decide what to say beforehand.
2. Unclear answers can make it harder for the kids
Your children will have concerns upon telling them about the divorce. They will want to know where they will live, if they will transfer schools, how you will attend their school events, and so on. You should provide them with satisfactory answers. This is why divorced parents should talk to their kids when they have enough information. And for issues, you haven’t figured out yet, be honest but let them know you will have answers soon.
You should be careful when talking to your kids about the divorce. It will also help to get legal guidance to protect your parental rights.